Approach: EFT
Emotionally focused therapy (EFT) is a couples therapy approach that works with the emotional bond between partners. Many recurring arguments, whatever the topic, come down to whether you feel you can reach each other and rely on each other. EFT helps you both recognize the pattern you're caught in and change how you respond to each other.
The Process
EFT can help couples who keep having the same argument about different topics, and couples who have stopped arguing because they've grown distant.
We also use EFT in individual therapy, when attachment patterns are affecting your relationships with people who aren't in the session.
We start by naming the cycle between you, so neither of you is asked to open up while still feeling blamed. Being more vulnerable with each other comes later, at a pace you can both manage.
More About EFT
Couples often arrive talking about their latest argument. In EFT, we slow it down to the moment just before it escalated and look at what each of you felt, what you needed and what your partner saw instead. Once you see that sequence together, the argument often makes sense to both of you for the first time.
We keep the focus on specific moments from your week, since general complaints are much harder to work with.
Both partners are welcome on the free 5 to 10 minute consultation. Sessions take place at our Coral Gables, Coconut Grove or Manhattan office, or over secure video as long as you're both in Florida or New York at the time. A 48-hour cancellation policy applies.
Couples therapy isn't the right setting when there is ongoing violence in a relationship. In that case, we'll help point you toward safer resources.
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